Tuesday, September 7, 2010

Don't know.

I don't know what to title this so forgive me.

I got a text from K the other day that another one of her cousins are pregnant. I couldn't let myself be happy for her. My only thought was asking K if she was ok. She has 6 cousins all around the same age. 2 have kids and now the third is pregnant. The only 3 left without kids are all boys. 1 gay and 2 not interested in kids at the moment, but I really don't doubt that they too will someday soon make the same announcement.

This Saturday was supposed to be our due date. It shocked me when I saw it still in my calendar. Then I looked back to December and saw the day we got the positive and then all the notes every day leading up to and including the miscarriage. So very sad. What a flood of emotions that brought out.

K and I haven't talked about it. I really hope her calendar still doesn't have the due date. I should sneak a peak at that just in case and delete it if it's still there.

Life goes on......


  1. A, I'm really sorry. Hitting a due date of a loss is hard in and of itself. Being surrounded by pregnant cousins and being on hiatus... I'm so sorry. That sucks and it's not fair.

    Thinking about you both.

  2. :::hugs::: While life may go on, the pain is there. I'm still so sorry for your loss.

  3. oh, sweetie... many hugs to you both.

  4. Sending you some hugs. :( I'm sorry you have to see this date go by without the joy of a baby to accompany it.

  5. I am so sorry you had this reminder of a painful experience. Hugs.

  6. Thinking of you both. And always sending love.