It's another NO.

This is so hard to write, but we got another NOT PREGNANT this morning. We are both heart broken. I have no idea what the future holds for us in the area of children. After 2 years, both of us trying, 3 surgeries, and $40,000 we are done for the moment. We are really on a break and only time will tell if we will ever be able to revisit this dream again in the future.

I wish you all the best and tons of luck on your journeys. I will keep this blog up a while so I can still find all of you and continue to cheer you on.

Have a Good Weekend!

I am so nervous I'm making myself sick. My heart is going 240 every minute and I catch myself saying PLEASE! PLEASE! PLEASE! PLEASE! PLEASE! PLEASE! PLEASE! PLEASE! PLEASE! PLEASE! PLEASE!.... Over and over again in my head and I don't even realize I'm doing it. I know I'm looking for any sign at all that would tell me that K is pregnant but the signs have been only few. I think I'm going crazy.

I'm really hoping for good news. Talk to you all Monday morning.

LONGEST TWW EVER!

I feel like the days will never end. We still have 5 days before we test and it feels like a year away.

Of course I'm so scared to see the results. I'm staying positive. Hoping and thinking only good thoughts.

We're trying to not look for signs or early symptoms. But it's hard to look for symptoms when she's been so sick the past few days. She always decreases her allergy medicine when we're trying even through she only takes the one that is pregnancy safe. So, this week her allergies have been in over drive and she is miserable.

That's about it in our world. I'll update next Monday.

Another TWW

Insem went well this afternoon. Sample had 21 Million swimmer which is very nice.

I have decided to not tell anyone about this try. I just called to day "an appointment". Didn't even say where I went. Even my best friend asked me today where we were in the process and I just couldn't say the words. So, anyone who reads this that knows me in real life please do not be mad but I just can't discuss it. I will update everything through the blog only and anyone who does not have access to the blog just won't know anything unless I decide to tell them a long time from now.

We were so excited to see a BFP after so long that we told friends and then we had to go back and tell them about the miscarriage. It was so hard. Something I don't want to have to do again. So, we'll get our BFP again (positive thinking) and then we'll wait at least 3 months to let everyone know.

So, I'll thank all of you in advance for being my outlet this cycle because I'm not giving any information to anyone else except my blog family.

TTC Update

Alot has happened since my last post and I'm happy to say that everything is looking great.

K has 3 perfect follies. Her ultrasounds have been perfect. We trigger tomorrow night and insem on Wednesday at 11am. We are heading straight for another and hopefully our last TWW. Of course this would be the last because we'll see a BFP at the end of it.

We are again very positive about this try. It is falling in to place so perfectly just like the last one. So scary but so exciting at the same time.

Thank you so much for all your support during this stressful time. I'm so thankful to have this outlet. This of us on Wednesday and I'll keep you posted.

The ride has begun again...

The consultation with the RE went ok. Basically he said because K did get pregnant was a great sign and he is comfortable continuing on the same path as long as we feel we want to continue. Meaning if we still want to emotionally or haven't run out of money. And for those of you who have been following our story for some time you know K got laid off over a year ago. Which has given us the time to devote to TTC but any extra money we had to try is about gone.

So, we've now started our last try. At least it's the last try for the moment. We're really hoping for another BFP. Everything has started off great. Her u/s looked great. Everything was quiet and no cysts. We're following the same plan almost exactly as the last one which got us the BFP.

We go back on Saturday for another u/s. It would be wonderful to see at least 3 follies.

That's about it here.