Doctor apt tomorrow

K. Had her follow up beta today to Mahe sure the pregnancy give and the beta went up. Not in a way you think things are ok. But up to say something is wrong.  We have an apt tomorrow to see what needs to happen next. I hope it's nothing serious.

Update

Not only had K miscarried but the little girl we have invested the last year of our lives to is now rejecting us. She had refused visits for the last 3 weeks. She won't talk to us and barely tolerates us at the family meeting set up to help her transition into our home. We may be losing her too.

Tonight is date night for K and I. I'm looking forward to us reconnecting. We need it.

Can't catch a break

We went for our first ultrasound on Monday and the pregnancy isn't viable. K's miscarring. I must have done something really terrible in another life.

We had a scare

K was bleeding and cramping yesterday. We went and had another beta done it is still going up like it should but we are so scared to lose this pregnancy also. K is staying in bed all weekend and I hope the baby is ok. Keep us in your thoughts and prayers.

Beta 2. 545

Everything is looking good.

BFP BETA 202

K's pregnant!

Update on our journey

Life has been hard since losing Ty, Noah and Jaxon. I'm depressed, angry and falling into a deep hole. I'm trying like hell to pull it together and I will but I'm trying to figure out how.

K is slowing doing better. She has had some closure. Some peace. But I haven't. I'm so happy for her and because she is finding strength I know that will help me find strength. We are so bonded and are able to help each other so much that she is the only thing on this earth I'm really sure of. That is my security. My saving grace. The reason I know I won't totally lose it.

We are getting the foster child back and we will be adopting her. This is going to be rough but it is something I know I feel I have to do for her and I think k feels the same way.

Last little bit of news k has decided to do ivf and carry for us. Our first ivf with her is this coming friday. My body failed us twice. I pray she doesn't go through what I did. I love that she is doing this for us. Gives us hope for that dream.

I hope my next post is a bfp.