Bad New Received.....

Well, it turns out I was wrong but the end result will be the same.

Turns out I am actually pregnant.  The embryo implanted.  BUT my beta is only a 3. That is not good.  Looks like the pregnancy isn't going to make it.  I retest again Thursday morning to see if there is any chance at all, but I'm not counting on it.  Not trying to be a negative person.  I'm just a realist. 

Expecting bad news....

Because I'm a very impatient person I took a home test last night and this morning.  Both negative.  I went in for the blood test this morning.  The woman taking my blood asked me if I tested and when I told her yes and it was negative she actually gave me her condolences.  Of course she back peddled and told me maybe my levels weren't high enough to register, but she knew just like me that it must not have worked. 

Thankfully we have prepaid for multiple tries.  Thankfully we have 7 frozen embryos.  We will try again. 

If by some miracle the blood work is actually positive I'll write again.  Otherwise I'll check in again later. 

It's finally here

It's finally going to happen.  IVF.  This Sunday.  My donor (the awesome & generous anonymous woman) has given us 18 eggs and as of today 16 have fertilized and are growing.  I'll have another update on Saturday and given the time for our appointment on Sunday. 

I'll admit that I never thought we'd ever try again.  I'll admit that for years while trying to pull my life back together from the first go round I was just going through the motions.  Saying the right things but not believing it.  Well, it's here.  Now, I know IVF is never a guarantee for success and at the end of all this I still might end up with no baby at all.  But I'm happy to be trying again. 

That's my update.  Short & Sweet.

Update

All the logistics that goes along with IVF...especially IVF using donor egg is A LOT! Not only do I have to worry about my meds but her meds too. To make sure I was getting the best price I contacted all the pharmacies on the list the doctor's office gave me and asked for quotes on all the meds first. Prices ranged from over $3300 to $2600. So glad I did that because of course I went with the $2600 option.

I started my shots a week ago and I already feel like a pin cushion and I'm only getting one shot a day. Soon it will be 2 and maybe even 3 shots a day. One of them is a huge needle that I just know is going to hurt. But I'm tough. It will be ok.

Everything has been falling into place nicely. We are happy with our egg donor. The financial needs of this process game together without any issues. I've gotten everything done that has needed to be done and we've also picked a sperm donor we are happy with and making that purchase is our last step. K's giving me all the shots and going through all of this with me.

We were so busy the first time we tried with AI that I felt very alone. I love that it's different this time.

I've blogged in the past about all the working out I've been doing the past year a half. Well, with the wedding in October and the promotion that has stopped the last 2 months. It's my goal to get back into the gym very soon. The one thing I didn't fully change when I was working out was eating really healthy. I should have concentrated on that too but I didn't. So, after the first 30 pounds of weight loss I was getting stronger but my weight was just maintaining. I am not totally focused on my eating and the weight is coming off again. I'm within the weight requirement for IVF and I'm not trying to lose weight in an unhealthy way. But I would like to be the best I can be before I get pregnant. If I can be down a few pounds before I start gaining weight with pregnancy I we prefer that.

My first ultrasound is Wednesday. We are now down to only weeks away from our first IVF try....Not months.

More to come.

Moving Forward....Finally

Mentioning in a previous post that we had decided to do IVF but with donor egg.  The success rate is much higher with both of being 40, or a little older :-(   

Last week I finally got the call.  After 8 months of being on a wait list I was called and told that I finally have a donor.  Now that we have accepted that donor we are now picking our male donor and getting all the paperwork in place. 

I'm expecting our first IVF to be January. 

This has been such a long journey so far.  Not that the journey is over by any means.  It is just starting up again.  But after everything I went through with surgeries and IUI and Kathy's numerous IUI tries just to end that phase with a miscarriage.  And then the last few years where I hit rock bottom and then started the healing process to prepare myself for now phase 2 of our journey. 

Not only did I receive a call about having a donor and being able to start IVF...Kathy and I got legally married  a few weeks ago and that same week I got a small promotion at work and I'm now working in a new group at work.  This is a lot of changes in a span of a few weeks. 

No matter what happens all of this has been a long time coming and I'm looking forward to the ride. :)

More to come....