I know that sounds like I'm
complaining. Maybe anyone reading this would think all I should be is grateful
that I'm pregnant again. I would have been that person. I would have thought
"be grateful for what you have". Until it happened to me. Now that
I've been through what I believe is the worst possible thing that will ever
happen to me....now I know better. Now I know that even though they were only
with me for moments it will hurt forever.
I miss them everyday. And even
though I will love and cherish this baby I'm carrying he (or she) won't replace
my baby boys.
We now have the 8 year old little
girl living with us as a foster child. She is terribly behaved, disrespectful
and just overall a mean little girl. She will definitely not replace my
innocent baby boys. I hope we are able to help her. I hope we can improve her
bad behaviors and when I first started this I thought for sure we'd be able to
but the more I get to know her the more I doubt that. I really think there is
something to it when they say a child's personality is set by the time they are
5. I didn't believe that until now.
That's
about it for now. I could type and type but this would turn into a "I feel
sorry for myself" post and those are never fun to read.
Pregnancy is rough enough as it is. Having to assimilate a high needs foster child sounds intense.
ReplyDelete